I wasn't really sure where to start with this post, but after a gym visit this weekend got my mind whirring I knew that I had to write something.
But where to begin - I think a post like this one requires a little bit of a background story for it to have the desired meaning, so, here goes...
Way before I began this blog and way before Willow came along, to fill my time between looking after Charlie and working full time I used to hit the gym - a lot - I was there six times a week without fail and for a few hours each and every time.
I loved the place.
I was physically a lot fitter than I am at the moment, I was a lot healthier, and whilst I may not have thought it at the time (how I wish I could go back and give myself a 'wake up woman' slap) I did look a lot better than I do now too.
But fast forward a few years, a pregnancy, a zillion sleepless nights and far too many mid morning energy crashes filled with a lot of pick-me-up-fast digestive biscuits and I'm now heavier, podgier, a lot less fit and a whole lot less confident than I used to be.
It's blooming hard work and I've had a lot of blips and falls but I really am trying to get back to a place where I'm comfortable again.
And going back to the gym was a huge step for me - especially going back to a gym that I used to go to, with people who knew me when I was fitter and more active.
But I did it, I took the plunge and now I feel better again about going to my Spinning classes - I'll even go on my own without a need for moral support to walk through the door...
My confidence is no where near where it should be though so anything that helps me feel OK is very much welcomed - and make-up is something which helps me with this - I don't ever leave the house without something on my face.
Even when I go to the gym.
Yes, really - at 7.15am on a Saturday morning before I head out to a mega sweaty gym class I will sit there and put on some make up - I mean it won't be a full face of foundation or anything but there will be primer, eyeliner, bronzer, two concealers and a dab of blusher.
And it is because of this make up wearing that this post was born - because of a comment I received about my early morning eyeliner wearing - I mean it wasn't meant to be a nasty or a malicious comment I do know that, it was more a curious comment relating to how can I be bothered with it all so early in a morning.
But it got me thinking, back to the time when I was gym-confident and if I had spotted a girl working out in lashes and lippie would I have passed judgement?
And do you know what, yes I think I probably would have had a fleeting thought and that isn't OK.
I know now first hand what it's like to feel uneasy and worried about stepping out of your comfort zone again and anything that eases this should be welcomed right?
So rather than stop myself getting to the gym, doing something I enjoy which is going to help improve my health in the long run I will gladly pop on that bit of bronzer and under-eye-bag-hiding concealer.
Actually, I don't care that the powder I brush lightly through my brows will be running down my face with sweat not long after I put it on because it helps me feel better and it gives me the little push I need to do the things I otherwise might not be 100% happy doing right now.
So yes, to answer that question my fellow gym go-er, I did put some make up knowing full well that it would sweat off within the hour, but do you know what, I'm happy with it.
That teeny bit of make-up got my backside off of the sofa and onto that spin bike and for that I'm more than grateful.
Moral of the story?
Well, whilst make-up in the gym isn't always ideal and is more often than not commented on, until you - or I - know the story behind that perfect 7am face and why it is needed, perhaps opinions shouldn't always be quite so negative...
I know mine never will be again
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